I put the "fun" in dysfunctional!

As most of you know I've been M.I.A. for, to me, what feels like ages.

I wasn't planning on letting anyone know what actually happened but Seb figured it out right away.

I was sitting here on March 7th minding my own business, well not actually but that's not the point. I was in my own little world just playing on the internet when suddenly outside my window I saw these blazing lights. Now, I live in the country so my first thought was, 'Who is in my driveway at this time of night?' When I got up to peer out the window it dissappeared like someone had flicked a switch. As I stared out into the darkness I couldn't help but wonder, 'Is there some maniac in my driveway; sharpening his machete at this very moment?' (Turns out I had worse things to worry about.)So like the genius that I am, I walk out the front door. Just like the dumb girls I always want to die in horror movies. I guess I can consider myself lucky that my life is not a movie and there wasn't somebody screaming "You dumb bitch! You're gonna get it!" at their t.v.

As I stepped out into the yard I was suddenly blinded. My first instinct was to sheild my eyes and try to stumble away. However, as luck or fate would have it, I was as graceful as one of the big-breasted blondes in every B-list scary movie; just without the big breasts or blonde hair. I tripped over my own two feet and crashed to the ground. I scrambled back up and suddenly felt myself being lifted. I tried to scream but no sound escaped my throat. Then, I was abruptly dropped but not to the ground. I was on a rubber-like floor in a brightly lit room.

There were no doors, windows or vents. I was completely alone in what I fully expected to be my tomb. I beat on the walls and they were a hard, spongy type of substance that I had never felt before. I screamed until my throat felt like it was going to bleed but I never heard a sound other than my own pitiful wails. Realizing there was nothing else I could do; I laid down on the floor and curled up into a ball. Almost instantly I began to feel better. As if, lying in the fetal position gave me comfort; hope. I noticed a gentle rocking motion that I hadn't felt when I was howling like a lunatic. I felt my eyes start to close and struggled to keep them open. Then I heard a voice say, "Shh. Jamie sleep now. All will be revealed when you open your eyes." I tried to respond but my lips seemed too heavy to move. I finally gave into the losing battle with my eyelids and dropped into a bottomless pit of oblivion.

When I awoke I could sense that I was not in the same place as before. I opened my eyes not knowing what to expect and into the face of none other than Pete Wentz. I scrambled up and said, horsely, "What are you doing here? I must still be asleep but why in the world are you in my dream?" He smiled that arrogant smile and said, "You're not dreaming. We've come to take you away." "Why would you want to take me anywhere; I can't stand you all." I asked, almost defiantley. (I mean come on; it's Pete the Peen how scared could I be at that point.) "That's exactly why. We knew that you sensed from the beginning that we were not human. So we had to take you so you can't let the world know our secret."

Uh oh. I have to go. I can hear his voice in my head and he's not happy with me for telling this.